In Love and War, all is fair
by NovenaMusa
Summary: She raised her look to meet his eyes and gave her husband what she considered that was a convincing smile. The girl supposed he would have returned it, if someone wouldn't have ripped his heart of his chest.
1. Chapter 1 (4-1-2015)

_Hi,_

_This is the first chapter of my first story here in this page. Please, I would be very grateful if you could warn me in case I made mistakes (my native language is Spanish, not English), or if you just want to review. It would be nice. I will try my best to post every Sunday. _

_Thanks for giving me a chance! :)_

_Kisses, Elena._

**Chapter 1**

_A few hours before the wedding, in the street._

Elijah felt absolutely overwhelmed, uncommon in him. When it happened, however, he wondered how it was that the same feeling of emptiness served to when he felt everything and when he felt nothing. It was one of those things in life that, after an eternity, he still did not understand.

Among all that was happening in the city and also bearing in mind the yet existing side effects of his captivity, he was feeling that his sanity was hanging by a thin thread. And he hated it. He incredibly hated being to the limit. Who would like to feel that is about to explode?

He preferred serenity. Cool head, he told himself frequently. Control and order were the only absorbent relationships he could afford having, besides those he already had with his family. Although they were not the only ones he wanted.

He sighed. _Hayley._

She was always in his thoughts. One way or another. He did not know how or when she had gotten under his skin, but she had done it, and to stay, looked like.

Hayley was different from all the other women. Maybe it was her independence, or the ferocity she used to hide an infinite unexplored sweetness, what undeniably attracted him. Perhaps he unconsciously craved she could teach him how to think a little deeper about himself and act sometime in his own benefit rather than always in the other's.

He recalled the many times he tried to hold back, to stay out of all the things that, for many reasons, did not suit him. Because of the recalling, Elijah also recalled how pathetically he failed each of those times.

Since he knew her, that all his decisions, were made, in part, to her pleasure and wellbeing rather than for the rest of his family's. Even though it was obvious that he cared about the baby, since she was his niece and the redemption of his brother Niklaus (something Elijah had been looking for over a thousand years); love always managed, somehow, of clouding his mind too easily. It transformed his reality into a world where everything was possible and it also made him forget some of his many obligations.

And because of that, he desperately needed order and control in his life. They helped him to keep his feelings in line and to act sensibly. They made him everything that he was supposed to be, what his family needed him to be, what, however, was not any of his siblings: rational, objective, wise, unselfish, and reliable. In summary, an honourable man. No wonder why he received the nickname of "noble Elijah", the good member of the Mikaelson family.

Nevertheless, he was not noble. Much less good. At least, not anymore, because that would mean that his human self, the one who had always fought for what was right and was incapable of an ounce of cruelty, was still alive within him and Elijah knew that, that part of him was already gone. If his memory served, it died a bit each time he allowed his father raise his hand to any of his family. He was a coward, thus, he allowed him to do it a lot of times.

The death of his human self, gave way to his true self, a monster. One that enjoyed of chaos and of the other's suffering. His alter ego was a firm believer of creating by destroying, which reminded him of the film "Donnie Darko", only that in a more sinister form, as it was real. The monster was dedicated to find the things which their victims were more afraid of and he converted them in reality. He made his prey live in their own nightmares.

He acted by bursts of violence and aggression, exactly the opposite behaviour of Elijah. In his horrendous vocabulary did not exist the word compassion, Elijah doubted that it even had the word feelings. Maybe it only had room for murder and torture. Elijah preferred not to know.

The monster wore a thousand years imprisoned. More precisely, tried to keep him imprisoned. There were times when he escaped from his cage, or maybe "the honourable man" permitted him to leave, he could not say in which side was his will anymore. Only on those occasions, Elijah remembers have been really happy. There was no sadness, just the joy of harming. He was very ashamed to admit that after an eternity of pain, that was a relief.

Nevertheless, he hid "his other side" to everyone and also to himself. Elijah wanted to believe that if he ignored him, the monster would just disappear or, at least, he would accept that it is a losing battle, therefore, he would stop to disturb. Instead, he was tireless, especially since her mother had revealed the truth about the death of Elijah's first love, Tatia; the monster seemed to fight harder than ever. Elijah assumed that was because his humanity was fading, as if it were smoke.

He was utterly exhausted.

How long could he hold this whole facade? Sometimes, the incessant attacks of the monster and the pressure of having to be perfect were simply excessive for him. It threatened to end what he had worked hard to build. Nonetheless, Elijah tried his best to prevent it. He promised to take care of his family, always and forever. If he did not fulfil his oaths, what kind of man was he proving to be? Still, it was impossible not feeling slightly tempted, it was, after all, an appealing offer.

Duty before any desire. Duty before any desire. Duty before any desire – he repeated internally... again. It was the particular anchor of Elijah. Whenever he felt he was carried away by the tide, he used the phrase to cling to earth. For an eternity it had worked wonderfully, but the enemy already knew his tactics. After all this time, the monster had probably got used to them and because of the advantage; Elijah could not use it anymore. He would have to find another way. Better soon.

Elijah was tired of being him and also of not being him. He did not know how was going to be his future. Did it matter, really? It would be a very dark period, with certainty.

The only thing that was clear now was that he had to, no; he needed to replace the amount of blood flowing through his veins by alcohol. It was the right time for drastic measures.

Even if there were many bars in New Orleans, his mind was only focused in one: Rousseau's.

It was not exceptional or anything similar, but it was the site where Camille worked. She was, after all, a friend and a protected of his family. There was no doubt that the waitress was aware of his situation and she would immediately inform his brother of where he was. Which, frankly, not amused him, but Elijah preferred to be located, than having to endure multiple calls and awkward and pointless conversations.

Furthermore, Elijah was sure that if he asked her politely and gave her a generous tip, she would allow him to have a long meeting with each of its multiple options.

Although, of course, he would end up, as always, opting for the bottle of whiskey. It was the fastest and delicious way to reach his next objective: stop thinking for a few hours. At least, not remembering what he had thought. He honestly did not care. Elijah just wanted some calm and time for him, for a change.


	2. Chapter 2 (22-1-2015)

_Hi, there!_

_I do apologize for not uploading a chapter, but I'm at college's exams' month so there's not much time for writing..._

_Also I have a totally different guess of what will happen in the TV show now, therefore, I wasn't quite sure if I should change my story or keep it the way it was._

_Thanks for reading, hope you like it,_

_Elena._

Chapter 2

_A few hours before the wedding, in the Bayou. _

Hayley was wretched. Again. It seemed that since she had to leave Hope to protect her from those who wanted to hurt her, all she felt was anguish. She had tried to mask her pain with cruelty, at least, with Klaus it appeared to work, but, she hadn't had the luck to obtain the same effect.

She cried during the day and fed in the night, a routine she easily got used to...the weeks, the months passed, as if the time had vanished. What always remained was sadness.

Until recently, Hayley hadn't realized how happy she had been a half year ago, when she was pregnant and living in the Bayou with the wolves. Hayley had gone from not having a family to having two: the Crescents and the Mikaelson, a bloody marvel. How could she have considered the possibility that something as beautiful and extraordinary would stay with her?

Nothing good ever stayed with her. She had been alone practically her entire life: her adoptive parents, her friends, her daughter…they were temporary.

Hayley guessed this pessimism was a result of not having known her real parents. She was taken on by a nice couple when she was a child and they were unaware of her position. Didn't aid either that the whole information the orphanage had about her parents was that they simply left her behind. Even if Hayley was mad at them, she was but still had some curiosity, an interest that increased after her first important moon, when Hayley became a wolf and destroyed her adoptive parent's living room. Hearing about her family then turned into an obsession, she had to find them for better understood herself, in order to feel complete, appreciated. For once. Once and for all.

For this reason, Hayley spent her entire adolescence looking for her father and mother. Not that it actually was a successful searching. She didn't even know where to start and frankly, her quest improved at a snail's pace, so slow that led her to desperation. Because of the despair, the girl committed many atrocities… it came to an instant when she no longer recognized herself. Who was her? - She recalled having wondered-. Where was that little child who just wanted to be loved?

Hayley was urged to believe once she was reunited with her family, she would be able to redeem herself. A start from scratch, a new life to reborn from her ashes and become who she was fated to be. She justified all her sins in the future's name, but now she recognized they were unjustifiable: she lied, betrayed and killed innocents, or, better said, innocents with her. Hayley mustn't have any sort of forgiveness, she should carry regret and shame forever.

The girl groaned inwardly due to the direction of her thoughts. It was Elijah's influence's fault.

Before knowing him, Hayley didn't bother about her decisions' consequences. At the end of the day, she was just doing what was enough to survive. Whatever it was, honestly, she didn't care. Why should she? She was alone in a world that always turned her away. The girl had no one to look after her or to simply help her, so, she could only rely on herself. If she survived so long by her own was, basically, because she guided her life according to two great lessons she had learnt the bad way.

The first was that goodness doesn't get you anywhere. She figured out this one when her adoptive parents kicked her out after the first full moon as a werewolf. Hayley hadn't been nothing but kind to them. By all means, she tried to not make them regret her adoption, she wanted to thank them the opportunity they had given her, and she also wanted to deserve the gift. Especially the deserving part, it was an essential condition to keep the present.

Truth be told, often, she failed at being a good daughter, but it was her aiming. Still, it didn't serve of anything; they didn't hesitate for a second to abandon her when she needed them most. Couldn't they realize their rejection hurt her? That maybe she didn't know what was happening and was afraid? Their support would have been helpful.

The second lesson, instead, was during a few weeks by her account. Initially, naive as she was, she used her money to buy the stuff. Of course, she couldn't go on like this, Hayley wasn't old enough to work therefore she quickly ran out of cash. She didn't have food, clothes or a place to live. The girl slept on the cold ground and looked for provisions in the trash at her free time. Incredibly, even if she was miserable and disconsolate, she had a code, though.

Hayley didn't want to steal, she couldn't do it. How did she know she wasn't going to fuck up, somehow, the person she was going to steal from? In the end, it was unavoidable. Despite the fact that she was stronger than any human, she remained mortal, vulnerable.

She was forced to consider her needs were more important than the other's. When it happened, the line between what was right and what wasn't, disappeared; the two mind states were replaced for something new: what she should do. To last, she had to take every chance, after all, they could, not crop up once more.

She didn't question her morality ever again. Obviously, that changed when she met the person with the most unquestionable morality. Hayley assumed people don't start to see how evil they are until they compare themselves with an individual.

Before Elijah, Hayley existed just to locate their parents. She collected information, followed clues, did favours to anyone who could lend her a hand... Anything, she didn't mind. The she-wolf was determined to make her dream true, whatever long it could take and cost. So she did, and everything was going as she planned until she discovered her father and mother were already dead.

Hayley had a big deception. Each act she did for them was absolutely worthless: all the sacrifices, the lies, the kills weren't going to be forgiven, there wasn't a new life to redeem herself. Her illusions were destroyed and she had nothing to fight for, again, it was a fucking infinite loop, a loop she couldn't escape from.

But, even if she didn't want to, Hayley couldn't resist thrilling when Klaus told her about her birth mark. He led her to the last stop of the trip: New Orleans, the place where she supposedly born, a place where she had already been. The Big Easy was a city ruled by vampires, where witches had a horrible secret and the werewolves had been exiled long ago. All this, while humans looked the other way if they had their wallets full.

The problem was Hayley was unaware of this; she came to the neighbourhood doing all sorts of intrusive questions, giving her real name and trusting strangers like she was a beginner. Probably she was too enthusiastic, due to being closer to reach her goal, to acting rationally. A mistake she wouldn't have made on normal scenario and caused her being kidnapped and held captive by a coven in an old cemetery.

In the cemetery, she met Elijah. She remembered the first time she saw him: he was there, standing next to Sophie Deveraux, and wearing a black suit that, seeing the way it fitted him, Hayley was ready to gamble it was made by a tailor. He had one of his hands in the pocket of his slacks (a gesture later she discovered that was very common in him) which ruined a bit his formal appearance.

Elijah was what would come to Hayley's mind when she imagined an angel: an exquisite, serene, powerful and unreachable being. He seemed too perfect to be real. However, Hayley wasn't fooled; she knew it was not gold all that glittered. There was something about him, something she didn't perceive yet.

Were the witches themselves who confirmed her suspicions. She already had heard them, despite she didn't know the conversation's topic, and they were exalted, even intimidated, although they pretended they weren't; but they couldn't mislead Hayley; she was perfectly able to smell their fear. That confused the girl, why on earth would the witches, considering they were proud creatures and capable of causing real pain, be afraid of the pacifism's personification? There had to be a good reason

The wolf began to study him in depth looking for what she was missing and just needed a few seconds to see it clearly. She insulted herself for having been so fascinated with his aspect to find out the truth: it could be that, at first sight, Elijah seemed quiet, even impassive, but it was more than that, his coldness transmitted the attitude of the predator when it know its prey has no escape, and also the unpredictability of not knowing with certainty the moment it would attack. He was a dangerous walking threat.

So, to qualify him better, the stranger was rather a dark angel.

Hayley didn't doubt she should dread him; nevertheless, something about Elijah invited her to calm down. Perhaps it was the tranquillity combined with gentle eyes, she wasn't sure, but even unwillingly, she found herself relaxing a little when he was in her presence. It didn't last long because, as she noticed, she immediately tensed and was defensive back. Then she asked: Who the hell are you?

She couldn't understand how and why this man with thousands of dollars as clothes had that damn effect on her. The irony of the circumstance: she was perfectly aware he could kill her without seeking it and, instead, Hayley was scared, much more, of the power he showed having on her.

From there, Hayley was more alert of her mood than ever, keeping up her barriers with all the conviction she had. It didn't require much effort from her before he took her to a private place to talk; Elijah remained too motionless, mode marble statue on, and he was staring at her, staring, as if she was a miracle he couldn't believe that might have happened, like she was what he had forever been searching. Sincerely, Elijah had a very unhealthy fixation (particularly, for her) of studying in detail whoever was in front of him. He always managed to speed up her heart, especially, each time she felt his eyes observing her. It seemed he was proposed to see through her, beyond her exterior, and it was an exciting yet terrifying experience.

The cemetery's gaze was kind of special, though. There was victory, optimism and hope, mixed with a burning intensity. In the moment, she didn't get it, but she did, later: her daughter was going to be Klaus's redemption, Elijah's brother and her one night stand. She was perfectly well and okay with that at the beginning.

However, after a while, Hayley was found wishing to be more to Elijah than the woman who was carrying his niece, she craved mattering to him for just being her; she wanted him to need her, to adore her… as much as she needed him, as much as she already adored him.

Then is when Hayley realized she was in love; despite she actually didn't believe in love. She wasn't sure what surprised her most, the fact that she fell for someone or that she was accepting it, without almost complaining, even secretly enjoying it. Certainly, it wasn't a situation she would had ever expected living, but she welcomed it.

Hayley welcomed the constant lack of concentration, the absorbent concern, the euphoria, the overwhelming passion, the fear, the expectations...She agreed with everything that love included, although, she still struggled a little against dependence and sensitivity. They were things she wasn't used to be, things she didn't let herself to be, and now, they were inevitable.

She didn't exactly know how to act properly about them; her feelings, made her feel shy and insecure, quite strange in her, in spite of not being totally unpleasant. There was also something attractive about vulnerability with the right person, maybe it was because of the trust…


	3. Chapter 3 (1-3-2015)

_Hey! :)_

_I have to warn you all about something. I've made a few changes in the story. I've been for a few weeks trying to write the chapter 4 and 5, about the meeting with the shaman and the real wedding, but, after not having much time, all the Haylijah's sadness and actual situation and a Elijah-Freya childhood one-shot coming soon, my inspiration for Hayley-Jackson scenes is practically non-existent, therefore, for not make it longer than what it should be, I decided to remove Chapter 3, like it never happened. I do apologize, I swear I tried but the chapters were pure s***, I must admit I was even a little ashamed._

_I think now I can be more constant in the uploading, the next chapters are very advanced in my language so I just have to finish them and translate. _

_As always I do apologize for any mistakes and I would appreciate if you inform me about them, or just review. I hope you like this one. Have a nice day! _

**Chapter 3**

"You may kiss the bride."

Jackson leaned over and put his mouth on Hayley's, creating a gentle kiss, with barely movement, but empty…wrong. She felt absolutely nothing; all she noticed was the insistent pressure of his lips. The girl related the action with brushing her teeth; something mechanical, without any emotion. Her heart didn't race wildly nor her temperature increased like she was in a spontaneous combustion. Definitely, there weren't any fluttering butterflies in the stomach. Besides, Hayley was quite sure that if they deepened the kiss, it wouldn't cause her to want more, lose control or would even impede her to think clearly.

Hayley remembered these were going to be the lips she would be kissing the coming years and had to close her eyelids since they were filled with the tears she hadn't shed the previous days. She hadn't cried, probably, because until then she hadn't accepted it was real.

Her husband smelled of smoke from fire and wood, a warm and nice combination. However, not comforting, just the scent of rain, morning dew and fresh wind could achieve it. And Jackson, sadly, would never be able to smell as well, there was just one person with the essence_. Elijah_.

He was the culprit that her body didn't respond as it should. It only reacted to him.

From day one, he had made her feel _everything_: pain, sadness, anxiety, confusion, disappointment, faith, euphoria, passion, tenderness, hatred. Each and every one of them and more. Being with him was like driving a roller coaster with endless electricity and no brakes. Her emotions went from one extreme to the other, practically never staying long in any of them, but something remained always constant in the trip, regardless of whatever she was experiencing: _love_; the feeling capable of such unsteadiness.

This was the difference between her two suitors. Jackson was the sea in a morning without waves, whereas Elijah was the tsunami that would flood and destroy anything in its path. One filled her in ways she couldn't imagine…or even understand, and the second fulfilled the promise of a manner to keep secure the most important: her daughter. That's why she chose Jackson...in part. The truth was she, on the inside, was scared as hell of Elijah. He could break her into a thousand of pieces and not just literally. The vampire was the only one able of both ruin and make her fly high. And he didn't require a lot to do it, simply saying some words or refusing to say them.

It didn't help much the fact that he was a withdrawn person, or that she was doubtful about his opinion of her new self. Since she became a hybrid they have been more apart than ever. Until they had sex, then, the distance built during months vanished like it never existed and Hayley's world was completely revolutionized.

She could admit she had missed him, _a lot_, but not every second as it began to happen. Including when he was just cooking dinner in the kitchen! Hayley was terrified. Being that reliant alarmed her; and more if she wasn't aware of his feeling for her. Was he infatuated or it was a fleeting or unrequited love according to Elijah?

Just in case, Hayley needed to move away of him; of his voice, his touch, his way of seeing the vulnerable sides of her that she had never shown to anyone...She wanted to escape from their absorbing connection, or maybe make him act once and for all? She wasn't sure, but she couldn't longer bear their "pull and push" relationship. Not if each time she was with Elijah, she adored him a little more, if that was even possible. She demanded a suit of armour to protect herself from the bullets directed to her core.

For that reason, Hayley decided to flee. After a whole life being rejected and unwelcomed, it was easy to grasp she called for some peace and security; the stability of someone who didn't have any type of power over her. Jackson was, somehow, a soothing zone. The girl was able to confess the plan was far from perfect, but it was fitting. Everything she would have ever desired…

Or perhaps all of this was nonsense and she was just desperately trying to convince herself that she was doing the right. Go figure!

The Alfa brushed her cheek with his thumb, ending the kiss and her meanderings. Hayley wasn't ready yet to face what now was going to be her reality; still, taking a deep breath, she opened her eyes. Jackson was standing in front of her, gazing with a hope and worship waiting to be reciprocated. She wished she did, and not only because he deserved to be married to a woman who _actually_ loved him, but it would facilitate the entire situation. The girl wondered if she would fall for Jackson, eventually. Could she learn _how_ to love in case she didn't?

_Do you have any idea how rare love is? _

Hayley shook her head subtly and forced herself not to go that route; the election itself was hard enough without her and her memories making it even more difficult. She raised her look to meet his eyes and gave her husband what she considered that was a convincing smile. The girl supposed he would have returned it, if someone wouldn't have ripped his heart of his chest.


End file.
